2005-07-24

A-bore-tic


A Pe(t)er for 5M's Wendy
So before his comment was deleted, this Abhoria lubber was briefly back. Clearly not wanting to take the time to read 5M's archives, he asked where does she meet her Peter Pans?

The answer is clear:

Where?
- at yoga
- at Bridgehead
- at poetry readings

All he'd really have to do to catch her attention is show up in one of those venues, perhaps wearing running gear and sporting one o' them heart-monitor / pedometer watches, and he'd be in there for a few weeks of trying to get her to switch her attention away from M.

[Later note: interesting that 5M deleted the question, but then answered it. Also interesting that we matched on 2 out of 3, but I left out Lavalife, while she left out Poetry Readings. Perhaps the lcp is not a Peter Pan.]

7 comments:

The Independent Troy McClure Observer said...

Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You may know me from such blogs as Burros of Bolivia, Steve's Underwater Racquetball Diary and All About My Pocket Lint. I know firsthand that blogging, not to mention metablogging, can be stressful. That's why I'm here to tell you about 10 handy tips from the University of Michigan health services department for destressing your cyberspace:

1. Concentrate on the present. Don't needlessly dwell on the past or worry about a future you cannot control.
2. Consider your problems one at a time. Don't lump your problems together, it can make them seem overwhelming.
3. Take positive action. Once you've decided what you want to do about a problem, act quickly and firmly.
4. Don't complain about your problems. Talk things over with your family and friends. Look for solutions.
5. Occupy yourself and your mind. Social activities can help during a time of stress.
6. Don't blame other people for your problems. Frustrated hostility will accomplish nothing and can only make you feel worse.
7. Exercise every day. Go for a walk and concentrate on your surroundings instead of your problems.
8. Maintain a daily routine. A familiar pattern of activities can decrease stress and increase your sense of security.
9. Avoid taking your problems to bed. Clear your mind of the day's thoughts so you can get a good night sleep.
10. Talk to your health care provider. She/he can help you find the right agency or person(s) to assist you in coping with stress.

Agatha said...

So, we know she likes Peter Pans. But why? Why is she Wendy to M's Peter? And why are there so many Peter Pans out there in our post-industrial world? Click here for a definition of Peter Pan Sydrome.

Anonymous said...

Troy! Hello! I think your list is magnificent. 5M should read it! We should all read it! And then act on it.
Aggie. What excellent questions you raise. I am an expert on PP's. I almost wrote the book on them. Which, by the way, makes great reading. "The Peter Pan Syndrome." Anyone wondering why they keep ending up with PP's, over and over, should read the book. It tells it like it is. Wendy. Er, 5M.
This is the weirdest coincidence, and YES, it is a coincidence. I, too, like the illustrious 5M, went to see Summer of Love at the Bytowne, last night.
I did not get free popcorn.
I thought the movie was weak. It had a simplistic, almost childish plot. Its centre of discussion revolved around the the sort of "first love" things we all learn when we go through our first love. You know, trust, betrayal, dawning cynicism, rich people yanking poor people's chains, etc.
While disarming to young people, to whom these kinds of things are fresh and interesting, these kinds of plots no longer entertain me. I've moved on and prefer movies that reveal new things to me.
But perhaps 5M's liking of this movie gives one a clue to her problem with finding a grownup guy. It wasn't a grownup movie, in particular. Is this a theme?
I do agree with her that the ending was terrible.
However, if you like seeing teenaged girls french-kissing, this is the movie for you!

4th Dwarf said...

Say, did you notice that Evil'der had something worth saying for a change? In that an actual Peter Pan would at least have fairy dust and flying?

I forgot about Lavalife as a way of meeting Peter Pans.

I have to admit that seeing 5M mention Lavalife gave me a charge. Maybe she's gearing up for another round. It will be hard on her, but I love reading about the LL dates.

And Siren Waggie, I'm glad to hear that you don't in fact have issues with disappointing men that colour your reaction to the 5M's postings.

As for Troy's list and all the other Doctor Phil type advice that people have for 5M, I'd be interested in knowing if there is support out there for the theory that giving people unsolicited advice is correlated with their increased happiness.

6th Apostle said...

Sometimes, when people are looking for a sympathetic ear, they get unsolicited advice instead. I'm told this is a particular confusion between the sexes. When a woman complains, she is looking for someone to agree with her and support her. She is not necessarily looking for solutions. For men, the focus tends to be more on engineering a solution to the problem. Maybe the 5M is no different by way of her blog.

4th Dwarf said...

I've heard that myth about the gender difference. My own fieldwork has shown no significant difference between men and women and the offering of advice or receptivity to unsolicited advice.

But it does seem that women are more likely to talk about their problems than men are.

The Independent Observer said...

The guy responsible for the "women want to be heard, men want to offer solutions" school of communication is John Gray, he of the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus books. A relevant excerpt:

"Women use language, just like men do, to make points and solve problems. However, they also use talking as a way of discovering what they want to say, and sometimes they talk about their feelings in order to sort things out; as a means toward eventually feeling better. At other times, women feel a need to share and express their feelings, simply as a means to get closer, or to experience greater intimacy. This is how women merge with their partner. Talking is part of sharing- sharing their feelings and sharing their thoughts without solutions and without being judged.

Men don’t instinctively understand these various approaches, because men tend to use language primarily as a way of making points. When men talk about problems, they are generally looking for solutions. A man mistakenly assumes that when a woman talks about her feelings and problems his role as a listener is to assist her in feeling better by offering her solutions. His overwhelming desire to help her is exactly what causes a woman to feel like she’s not being listened to. It also causes her to feel like she is not important to him. It’s an interesting paradox; if he didn’t care he wouldn’t try to fix things."