Young Bucks in Blue Suits

As the 5M so astutely points out--we live in a government town full of young bucks in blue suits. In the 5M's latest posting, she asks her readers "don't you think...YBIBS, would be responsible enough for a long-term relationship?" Then she asks: "could I be interested" in a YBIBS?
Now, my challenge to the ESI team is to respond to the 5M's questions in a supportive, non solution-focussed fashion.


4th Dwarf said...

I was talking with Nate the other day about this very issue with the 5M.

All indications are that she's a hottie. She's clearly also a smartie. And she gets melancholic.

A fatally attractive combination for a certain type of stable fellow as we've discussed at length.

In my experience, YBIBs are often prejudicially judged as being boring, stodgy accounting types when the fact is they can be creative types who have better day jobs than the actors and painters waiting tables in the market, and than the students who can't get around to finishing school and entering the work world. (Among whom I do not count the 5M because she carries a heavy work load with the all the courses she teaches.)

It's not like YBIBs have choices about what they wear. I was thinking today on my way to the salt mine that I'd like to paint my work boots, but the powers that be would never stand for it. It could even interfere with my apprenticeship after Pirate School graduation.

Corrie said...

OK, supportive, non-solution focussed. Hmmmmm...
Could YBIBS be non-PP's? Yes, I say! Go for it 5M! Could 5M be interested in YBIBS? Yes, I say, YES, YES, YES, oh yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes....Go for it 5M!

So, how was that?

In any event, they gotta be better than some guy who paints his work boots, wouldn't ya think?

The Editor said...

We take pleasure in answering thus prominently the communication below, expressing at the same time our great gratification that its faithful author is numbered among the friends of The ESI:

Dear Editor—

I am 37 years old. Some of my little friends say there are no YBIBS I would like. Papa says, “If you see it in The ESI Blog, it’s so.” Please tell me the truth, is there a YBIBS I would like?


5M, your little friends are wrong.

They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except what they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, 5M, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, 5M, there really is a YBIBS for you, somewhere. And why not? I would even venture there are a few YBIBS out there that may not be the stereotype that we tend to think them to be. YBIBS with artistic souls and creative spirits. YBIBS that can spend a night watching the latest play at the GCTC as easily they could shop at Walmart for a new swing set for the kids. YBIBS that are as comfortable getting nasty on silk sheets as they are going over program management spreadsheets.

If you don’t believe in YBIBS, why, you might as well not believe in fairies. And well, we all know that the fellow you’ve been hanging with lately, well, …I won’t say anything more.

The Independent Observer said...

Despite the Editor's opinion, perhaps YBIBs are mythological creatures not unlike our own Siren (no offence). If the following is to be believed, the federal public service is a boneyard of broken dreams.

Corrie said...

No offence taken, of course. I WOULD be offended if any one suggested I were anything BUT a mythological creature.
But I miss the counsel of one wild dog. You, with the pointy sniffer and cutie-pie ears. What do YOU think?

Conch Shell said...

Can she love a YBIB? Can we cut down own wanking? Does she love M? Are we becoming our personas?
"Our natures are, indeed, elusively insubstantial - notoriously less stable and less inherent than the natures of other things. And insofar as this is the case, sincerity itself is bullshit." (Quoting the concluding lines from a famous modern-day work of philosophy that speaks to the nature of our times, by Frankfurt).

4th Dwarf said...

From the Comment Section to 5M's Last night M and I saw Summer of Love

At 10:42 PM, Aporia said...
Lavalife :-)

My apologies, by the way, for my previous post, which I see you've summarily deleted, along with your warm and friendly reply. It was, believe it or not, meant in the friendliest way, though I realize now in retrospect how pompous it must have sounded. (Incidentally, I think you were right, though I was going more for encouragement than empirical accuracy.)

Agatha said...

What does "Lavalife :-)" mean? I loathe those smiley things! Do you think it means that Aporia is a lavalife user? Maybe someone would like to investigate this. It seems that Aporia is attempting to ingratiate himself with the 5M.

Agent A said...

Given the recent improvement in posting quality, perhaps the CRTF research department can put some effort into this inquiry.

coyote said...

A, O, 5M. I need a programme to sort out all of these would-be metabloggers -- or, in the case of a(i) a(i) o, (Hum Old McDonald's Farm to get the drift....) spurious meta-metabloggers. I think I'll dub you 'sploggers'. Yup. You're Sploggers.

Agatha said...

Sploggers: the scourge of post-industrial society--along with all those PPs.

trodat said...


I know what you are implying. Seems you are painting Ottawa male civil servants with one very bland shade of blue.

Drawing only from typical stereotypes about public servants (here I go, stereotyping about stereotypes), suppose you are assuming the worst, that Ottawa-based YBIBS are homogenous, boring, complacent creatures of habit, lacking sorely in independent thought. Dating one cell of this sick composition of Ottawa's suited-fellows means a proportionately higher risk of landing with someone - a potentially smart guy, who, due to his non-defined viewpoint, will motion a BAD IDEA in some larger capacity. Ultimately these "types" do nothing to change the status quo. An unfair assessment of all YBIBSs, but ultimately a legitimate fear if the person holding such fear cannot herself be forced into a similar restrictive category. Dump that notion now. Let's assume there are shakers and movers within the bureaucracy but you just don't see them. They simply may not be interesting enough for the six o'clock news - that is unless they are screwing up royally.

Now let me lay out another (fictitious?) generalization: academia is a quiet vacuum. Similarly, you are but one speck of dust in a large vacuum bag. This machine is so quiet - who the hell knows? - it may be moving the dirt around but not really fundamentally changing anything. We all know that noise creates, at the very least, the illusion of activity. (What ever happened to good old fashioned carpet beating? - dirt/out/effectively. Archive: www.vachunter.com/beaters). Just because I don't hear the vacuum, doesn't mean it's not sucking dirt!

Why shouldn't two generalized, institutionalized minuscule particles unite nebulously? Go for it 5M! Grab the first YBIBS you see. Just look for the radical colours underneath the Moore's navy.

(solution-based, I know)

4th Dwarf said...

Looks like the CRTF is needed after all.

coyote said...

All previous criticism of the CRTF, implied or otherwise, is now summarily withdrawn. Bring the buggers on.

The Independent Rex Murphy Observer said...

Celebritydom is the popular currency of our time. Britney Spears, Brad Pitt and Paris Hilton reign supreme in the media pantheon. What then of the 5M and her blog, the au courant method of chronicling one's whims and desires for the world to read, discuss and dissect? The blogosphere, despite the ever-present flim-flammery and jabberwock of the digital diaspora, is the perfect medium for the curious new breed of celebrity typified by our muse the 5M. And why shouldn't she be the recipient of our attention every bit as much as Britney or Brad? Is she not equally fascinating, and perhaps moreso? We absorb the travails of the famous with a definite dash of Schadenfraude, smirking gleefully when those richer and more privileged than us stumble and crash. But when we read of the 5M's latest drama, it is quite different. For every guffaw and sardonic remark, we are as frequently moved by genuine pity or empathy. Because in cyberspace we are all celebrities of a certain order, shining brightly for those who would gaze upon us.

Agents A and O said...

Trodat: Please see CRTF Guideline B.4.

IRMO: Nice use of ironic wanking.

The Rest of you: please move along, there's nothing more to see here.

Agatha said...

Agents A and O, I know you're just doing your job here, but I'll move along when I'm good and ready, thank you very much!
I happened to think Trodat had some relevant things to say about vacuum bags.