2009-03-13

A fifth of Friday the 13th...

Another Friday the Thirteenth. I'm sure we had one of those just last month. Ho, hum. We must've gotten all the bad stuff out of the way, already then, right? What could possibly go wrong this time? You have to ask? How about another Top Five list?

1) Strangely, although our PM keeps telling us the Canadian economy is in great shape and we're all gonna be fine, and he's, like, never lied to us (repeatedly) before... markets are still tanking. I can't help but notice that he takes a certain approach to everything that might dispute his worldview, from what's actually happening in the economy (i.e. anything from the parliamentary budget officer he appointed), to Vancouver's InSite safe-injection facility, to, well, just good-quality research in general. Because deeply-held convictions, however unwarranted by facts, are necessarily the only Right things. I am shocked. Shocked! Never saw that one coming at all...

2) Now that mommy's defeat at the American vice presidential polls is a soi-disant distant political memory, Bristol Palin is no longer about to bear her child within the sanctity of holy matrimony. Or a shotgun marriage. Whichever is more, y'know, born-again. I am shocked. Shocked! Never saw that one coming at all...

3) John Baird's fattening fingers - and possibly his hair - are smearing oily DNA traces all over the aftermath of Ottawa's record transit strike. In the absence of any actual, like, unbiased information on the dangers of scheduling, he may wish to consider a prudent wait before plastering on pandering ideological band aids. Oh, wait... See 1), above! I am shocked. Shocked! Never saw that one coming at all...

4) The Ottawa Sun, in the tradition of intrepid journalism, has used promo material from a 5-year-old, just-released, low-budget Canadian Bollywood movie clone - starring current Liberal member of parliament Ruby Dhalla - as an excuse to run a lame-o "Hilltop Hotties" photo gallery online, while Dr. Dhalla tries to wish the whole thing away on grounds of Photoshop. I am shocked. Shocked! Never saw that one coming at all...

5) Heh.

I am shocked. Shocked! Never saw that one coming at all...

4 comments:

TWFKAH said...

Whoo hoo! Love that #4! Ruby, the Doctor of Chiropractic who freely entered into Bollywood cloning, is now mortified to admit same. Poor Rubes!
Truly, though, I've never heard of claims of slander standing up in court, on the grounds of Photoshop!

coyote said...

Good to hear. Because if there's ever a Canadian judgment on that, some of us around here might be collar-deep in, ummm, digital developer....

nursemyra said...

am I the only one who immediately thinks of Cockney Rhyming Slang when i read Bristol Palin's name?

coyote said...

I've been around the block in Britain enough to know what "bristols" are, ma'am. But rhyming slang never occured to me...