2008-07-12

RNDP Spoiler: Women are from Venus, Dwarfs are from Pluto

So, I was skootching around the intertubes this morning, favourite breakfast nearby and doggy eyebrows deeply furrowed over the true import of the latest Revolutionary New Dating Paradigm treatise from that whacked-out Dwarf ummm, my esteemed blogging associate, when I fell across a news item that caused me to spew milk and Cap'n Crunch all over the monitor.* It was a blinding, capitalized, Eureka Moment. At least until I wiped up the mess.

It seems that after last year's scandalous astronomical furor in which Pluto lost its planetary status (You missed that? How strange.) astronomers have now decided to compromise and call all dwarf planets 'Plutoids'.

Suddenly I got it! I see where 4th Dwarf's RNDP is going, and why he's so desperate to get buy-in. I mean, he's been flogging this thing hard! See, many dating paradigms in the past few years have referenced this catchily-labelled (and lucrative) little trope. But if Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, where in the world(s) do dwarfs come from? The answer has to be the Dwarf Planet. (For proof, I refer you to Wikipedia, which makes a huge point about Pluto's eccentricity) And Pluto has been planet non grata since the big astronomical society dust-up. Which is about, I must point out, when this RNDP stuff started.

Obviously, if the the Short Guy is ever gonna get a date again, he's got to persuade women that he's still got standing somewhere in the relationship cosmos. Or at least the solar system. And regaining some kind of status for Pluto is a big part of it. I see it all now. He's done it!

Welcome back to the dating game, my short-ass friend. Good luck with that. But I hafta warn ya: the women you date from here on, will probably only be interested in Plutonic relationships...

* For a definitive 11,000-word treatise on how best to partake of Cap'n Crunch, please see Neal Stephenson's Cryptonomicon. Don't remember the page. Sorry.

3 comments:

XUP said...

Well, blow me down!

Pandora said...

ummmmm..... minutes of emergency meeting????

Harmony said...

Yes, this blog is SO boring without minutes. Ahem?