Forget Larry, Let’s Talk About Flirting

Over at the Elgin Street Muse blog, there is quite a bit of talk about flirting. Manny Blue mentioned that flirting is a four season activity. Anonymous wanted more instruction. Conch Shell felt it was more of a pre-relationship thing. I like that Aggie concluded that we should just be doing it, and not over thinking it. Certainly, to me, it is an every day activity.

I flirted with an enchantingly pretty young woman this morning. The barista at a Starbucks. She had wild, radiant hair that had strands pulled up in a few places and that were held up by coloured elastics and pretty little barrettes. She wore shiny shell and silver jewelry, and at first I thought she looked a bit like a fairy tale princess - like the one in The Princess Bride. I noticed that the chalk board on the counter that names the baristas had a drawing of two Mermaids (one blonde with wild hair like my barista). When she handed me my coffee, I looked her in the eyes, smiled amiably, and told her that she did indeed look like a mermaid. She broke out into a lovely smile, and thanked me sweetly.

I flirted with a scrumptious young man this afternoon at a Bridgehead. I liked how he had a bit of an old fashioned look about him - as if he had just walked out of the late seventies. Maybe I just wanted to believe he looked that way, because that is when I would have been the age that I suspect he is now. I asked him if he would make my latté pretty like the last time. Last time he made a half-moon design in the foam. We chatted about how in Vancouver they make all kinds of nice designs in the latté foam. He had my undivided attention. He mentioned that a friend of his was being flown from Vancouver to somewhere in the States to compete in foam decorating.

“I’m really not very good at this,” he apologized.

“In Vancouver someone made a heart in my foam.” I mentioned.

“There you go,” he said handing me my latté, “but I don’t know what it is.”

“Look,” I said, turning the cup around for him to see, “it’s a tulip.”

“Oh, wow, so it is.” He marveled at his art.

I winked at him and said, “Now I can tell my friends that a nice young man gave me a flower today.”

He smiled and blushed.

Ms Army Pants witnessed the flirt with the young man and was told about the flirt with the young girl. She called me dirty.

“You’d do anything for sex wouldn’t you.” She accused.

“It’s not about sex,” I protested. “I am much too old for either of them. It’s about connecting, it’s about having conversations, it’s about making people smile…” I explained passionately and honestly.

“No, you’re just dirty.” She insisted.


Conch Shell said...

At first I was thinking, you weren't flirting, you were being nice. But, as I read on I changed my mind and realized you were definitely flirting. I like how you controlled the conversation with the young male barista and got him to flirt back by giving you a flower! I'm curious as to who this Army Pants is, though, and why she's so certain about you being dirty.

Aggie said...

Isn't "dirty" one of those words that has been reclaimed?
I'm currently reading a book called "The Grandmothers" by Doris Lessing. It's about two women who fall in love with each other's teenaged sons, have affairs with them, and then vow to be "respectable" in their old age. These dames take "flirting" to a whole new level. They are dirty. Maybe you are just "durty", Woodsy.

zoom said...

There's flirting, and then there's dirty flirting. On the surface this sounds like good old-fashioned squeaky clean flirting, but maybe Ms Army Pants picked up on some dirty undertones.

By the way, that Doris Lessing book sounds interesting Aggie. Maybe I'll pick up a copy for my mom.

coyote said...

Interesting Conch, that you'd associate flirting with control. There may be something to that.

But Woodsy, may not Ms. Army Pants be saying as much about herself and her own perception of flirting, as about you? I've watched you work a room in flirt mode, and while there's winking, smiling and a certain lightness of touch, I don't see any of the heavier and darker nudges and leers I'd associate with dirt.

I feel fairly sure that Megan may have written about this already, but I'd suggest that a flirty interlude, done well, usually leaves its object thinking, "Did that really just happen?"

And smiling at the memory.

pandora said...

By all means, let us flirt, mes enfants! And as Aggie so wisely said, let us not overthink it. However, let us continue to discuss it thoroughly, because - nudge nudge, wink wink - isn't that more than half the fun, whether you are flirter, flirtee, or both...

Woodsy said...

Conch Shell: Ms Army Pants is definitely projecting. My flirts are indeed innocent. She, on the other hand, is a dirty flirt... but I truly admire her style. She doesn't flirt commando style, i.e. short direct hits, rather she flirts to conquer.

Aggie: When I flirt it is sweet, but when I dance it is DURTY!

Zoom: You know very well that I am squeaky clean... well except for my fascination with Nursemyra's Friday posts...

Coyote: You are the gentleman of coyotes... Thank you for defending my honour... and so poetically.

Pandora: I always enjoy flirting with you... wink, wink!

pandora said...

air hugs!

Anonymous said...

I mean this in kindness, but coffee shop guys flirt back with everyone. It is part of it.

Woodsy said...

Thank you anonymous... I take your comment in kindness... I agree that coffee shop guys and gals flirt back with everyone, but that wasn't the point of the tale...