2005-07-27

The Wankometer

Hi. I'm coyote. You all know me -- I kill things and eat them. I'd like to take a moment from ESI's regularly scheduled programming to make a brief celebrity public service announcement: This metablog, as anyone who reads about half of a thread quickly realises, is focussed first, on 5M, and second, on self-referential wanking. In recent days, we've gained a coterie of spurious metabloggers ('sploggers') of variable utility. Agents A & O (blood types, or what...?) of the self-appointed Content Review Task Force, for example, are sploggers that serve a useful purpose. Although they still piss me off no end.

Others with less restraint -- I'm tempted to say "You Know Who You Are", here, but almost by definition, ya don't -- have riffed on vacuum bags, for example, to the point where our trusty analog Wankometer finally pegged out, after the needle plunged past baroque, slammed through rococo and then hit the wall.

We're now working on a bomb-proof digital version.

But in the meantime, sploggers, a simple rule of thumb: there's a fine line in wanking. If one splogs too far, one splooges. This act is unattractive and messy, and should remain purely private. In public, please exercise at least minimal wanking restraint, if not brevity.

Thankyou. Now, back to our regular postings...

3 comments:

6th Apostle said...

Well said, Coyote.

Don'tEven OwnAVacuumBag said...

Coyote, how do you manage to use so many edifying words, so eloquently, whilst in the process of killing and eating things?

coyote said...

I ate a dictionary once. It was a lean winter. And the stomach ache was gawdawful...