Protection for 5M - Stunning Shoes

One of the recurring topics in our Ethics Committee meetings is whether we should take steps to protect 5M from the possibly dangerous stalkers she will inevitably acquire.

In this morning's web surfing, I came across this:

Electric Cinderella

Drawing from the myth of Cinderella a pair of elegant sexy shoes with a crystal tip but with a new power inside: a stun gun. It’s just a shielded, potential weapon, meant to be used only once, as the wearer has to break the glass to use it.

Cinderella is no more without defenses; waiting for the prince to save or worse to chose her. She goes out and enjoys the world without fear; she can now intimidate intimidators without losing her innocence.

She can have her freedom, Cinderella transforms herself into Barbarella: sexy curious queen of discovery.

Perhaps there are other ideas or products out there that we could put the vulnerable lass onto.


The Chair said...

Here's another accessory from Emma Peel's closet. Ouch!

Who invents this stuff?

The Independent Observer said...

How about this innovative device,
The Aluminum Foil Detector Beanie,
which offers a cheap and unobtrusive form of mind-control protection to the masses.

An artist's rendition of the 5M in her brand new detector

coyote said...

"People generally marry or end up living with those who speak to their core weaknesses, not their core strengths. Staying together happily relies on taking risks to radically change each partner's role in the relationship."
-- Keith Ablow, M.D.
New York Times, May 30, 2005

The Chair said...

Here are the correct pointers for the Aluminum Foil Detector Beanie and the artist's rendition of the 5M with her gear

Agatha said...

Forget the 5M, when I get back from the Orient Express, I suggest we get together and make some AFDBs for ourselves.
Coyote - would you like to expand on the Ablow quote?

4th Dwarf said...

Coyote, good quote, but how does it fit with electric stun gun shoes, stilleto tampons and aluminum foil hats?

Are the doggie drugs kicking in a little stronger?

Agatha, safe journey. Keep that curtain on your bunk tightly closed.

coyote said...

Yes, safe journey, Agatha. You have an, ummm, Herculean task ahead.... good luck with that.

As for the Ablow quote, all I meant by posting it was to suggest that we're often attracted to the things that are worst for us -- human or otherwise. A serendipitous corollary, seen on today's CBC Noon News, is that some doctor (Sorry, didn't take notes about whom... us coyotes are bad about using pencils, except as chew toys.) used MRI imaging to discover that the brain of a person in love fires brightest in about the same areas as the brain of a jonesing crank addict. As does the brain of person who's been jilted, but who hasn't accepted it yet... And sudden withdrawal can lead to clinical depression in 40 per cent of cases.

It apparently all boils down to insanity & pathological need. So in fact, humans as a race are, as that noted beat philosopher Robert Palmer says, Addicted to Love. Grim tidings indeed!

And, Dwarf, since I'm apparently touching on the topic already, I'll torque the pharmaceuticals issue one revolution tighter: the doggie drugs that you so cavalierly dismiss are wonders of the modern age. At least the age that was modern during the last century. Full stop.

Except to suggest that anybody embarking on a love affair anytime soon had better wear their AFDB securely scotch-taped. That'll help....

Agatha said...

Thanks for clarifying that one, Coyote. Now, can you pass over some doggie drugs, please?