Aphrodisiacly, Coyote*

If you knit a male friend a pair of tube socks and only have time to finish one before the gift exchange moment, don't wrap up the one sock on its own. Or, you will likely get asked, How did you know my size?, and be reminded about your naive faux pas for years to come.

Also, don't give a male friend a personal massager. Honestly, no matter how you explain that you innocently bought it for his sore muscles (being that he is a labourer), he will tell all his friends that you gave him a vibrator.

And, if wanting to make Coyote happy you give him a bag of granola with dark chocolate in it, be certain to look at the label carefully. Or, he will laugh out loud and say something like, So why exactly are you giving me this granola?

*And, that will be his salutation next time he sends you an email.


XUP said...

Next time give Coyote some Corn Flakes.

Asteroidea Press said...

And the Value Pack of Aphrodisiac, no less. Enough bang for the buck, har har.

dave1949 said...

Silly coyote stop asking inane questions and go with it for goodness sakes.
For someone so inherently wise I sometimes wonder about you.

Woodsy said...

XUP, If only I'd read this first.

Megan, Ha!Great observation - next time I'll get you to review gifts that I give to male friends.

Dave1949, Coyote is a gentleman first and foremost.

coyote said...

"A brief notation in his Journal of December 3, 1909, in which Gide refers to the story of Lafcadio, announces the striking thesis that there is no essential difference between a gentleman and a knave." -- Fowlie, Wallace, Andre Gide: His Life and Art, pp. 68-75, The Macmillan Company, New York, 1965.