A bridge (naming contest) too far(-fetched)

According to the City Journal, the Rideau Canal Pedestrian Bridge Naming Committee has whittled down 50 potential monikers to just three: Somerset Footbridge, Charlotte Whitton Footbridge, and Corktown Footbridge.

We ESIs turned our ADD-addled minds to this question briefly and came up with several possibilities. However, we never, uh, got around to selecting the best one for submission to the committee, though the dependable Bob did suggest the Somerset Footbridge handle.

Here then are the Top 10 not-quite-so-much-rejected-as-never-formally-proposed names for the bridge, in no particular order (though I like the playful insouciance of Aggie's possibly bilingual suggestion):

10. Le Pont Bridge (4th Dwarf)
9. Pont Ifical (Coyote)
8. Music Bridge (Harmony)
7. By-ped Bridge (Anonymous)
6. Castor Bridge (Coyote)
5. Pont of Order, Talking Pont, Pont of Insanity (Coyote)
4. Rainbow Bridge (Coyote, now smacking of desperation)
3. Justin Trudeau Bridge (Conch Shell)
2. Demarcation Pont (Apostrophe)
1. Inspiration Pont (Aggie)

The ever-waggish Research Director chimed in recently with The Choketown Bridge. Then the Sens finished off the Sabres. But, hmmm, if Ottawa quacks out four straight ...


Aggie said...

I can't believe Charlotte Whitton is one of the possibilities. Perhaps we should just direct our energies towards putting a stop to that one. The woman was a horror.

4th Dwarf said...

But Ms Whitton was a pioneer of human rights:

"The expulsion of the Acadians was neither hastily nor ruthlessly executed: it was a twice deferred act of military necessity, insisted upon by the threatened colony of Massachusetts, and, for its day, carried out with humanity comparable to our own war-time evacuation of Japanese from the Pacific coast--and there was not nearly as much profit made out of it." from "WHITHER CANADA" An Address By CHARLOTTE WHITTON

The Chair said...

Okay, so Ms Whitton was a bit of a horror but you gotta love some her contributions to good governance. My favourite tale about our former mayor is the adoption of the orange painted cars and trucks (remember them??) for all City of Ottawa vehicles. Apparently, it was to keep tabs on slack-ass public works employees who were noted to hang out in the local taverns while on shift. Perhaps an urban legend, but still makes for some great lore.

zoom said...

Charlotte used to work where I work, and the legends still abound. Not surprisingly, she disliked mirrors, and so she had all the mirrors in the building covered with brown paper, even those in the bathrooms. She instructed the staff to take a good look at themselves before they left for work in the morning because they wouldn't be seeing themselves again all day.

coyote said...

Enough of Charlotte, already. She ain't gonna win. The Corktowners have a bigger lobby.

I (the dog says, no doubt smacking of even more desperation in the IO's eyes, even though he thinks of himself as merely prolific...) propose, after listening to the parade of drunks whoop and weave their ways home until pretty much the morning after the Senators' conference win, that we re-open the contest. And call it "A Bridge Two-Four...."