2005-09-02

Corrected Poll Results

Accurate to +/- 7 votes
As you see in the confession below a certain furry metablogger has confessed to shamelessly voting over and over again for the same option on the most recent poll.

While this means we cannot truly be certain of the exact numbers for any of the options in the most recent poll, we can be certain that there were no votes for any of:

  • Another starving artist,
  • A younger guy,
  • A dude, or
  • Another PhD student.

An option that would apparently be supported by the majority of respondents would be for 5M to hook up ...and she could fix your car, if you know what I meanwith a successful lesbian who welds metal sculpture while wearing blue coveralls.

So far we've turned up no matches on LL or Yahoo dating, but we will keep looking. I understand that Jennifer Beals, the hot welder in 1983's Flashdance is now on the L-Word, perhaps she'd be available.

How can 5M meet her successful semi-blue collar gal? One possibility would be a continuing education course with the Ottawa School Board (pdf file of courses). None of the downtown schools offer suitable classes, but Brookfield High isn't too hard to get to. One class that 5M could sign up for is

Home Maintenance for Women (Ms. Fix It) (I & II)Confront household problems such as: basic carpentry jobs,caulking, plastering, painting, grouting, weather-stripping, leaky faucets, problems with toilets, electrical repairs, etc.

Brookfield HS, Tony Bravo ............................. (4661)

Oct 15 & 29, Sat 09:00-03:00 PM ..................... $90.00

(Added bonus: In a pinch, 5M could fix up things around the apartment and so not have to rely on inefficient building staff.)

But there is one thing we have to accept. 5M just might not be into girls. As much as one of our members likes to say that "we're all on a continuum", every continuum has points at the end. As one New York City woman was recently overheard to say:

I'd rather be a bitch than butch. I'd rather have a thousand men than one woman.

4 comments:

coyote said...

The pirate tries to take the high moral ground? Sounds like certain Texas political dynasties. Ya might want to re-correct your allegedly corrected results, ya spurious little finagler -- the 'nobody' option already had seven votes, none mine, by the time I began my Florida primary ploy. And I'm pretty certain I didn't toss in all the votes after that, either.

Anonymous said...

I'll come right out and say it.

You, Pirate, have been hoping, oh my, hoping that the "woman" choice would come out on top -- no pun intended coyote.

You just couldn't wait to find the results skewed so as to give your ardent first choice, and nightly fantasy, its rightful spot.

Well, don't get your eye-patch in a knot, me matie, but coyote ain't the only who's done some skewing.

I too admit intrigue. I voted, and I voted often. I voted for different things. And sometimes, I voted for the same thing again.
Now, what EVER is the REAL corrected poll going to look like, do tell?

The dwarf has no right to post a "corrected" poll. The only results that are "correct" are the ones counted. Shrinkie there can't project his own desires and ideas about how voting was skewed, because he can't possibly know how it all came down.

If you really want CORRECT polling results, you better post a poll that allows every person to vote only once, eh matey?

And then make EVERY choice the lesbian one. That way, you'll get what you want.

Anonymous said...

6A: you saying lesbians have no sense of fashion?

Anonymous said...

It's creepy.