Father Joe in Moncton

Local media reported last week that our old friend Father Joe Leclair is now ministering to parishioners in the Blessed Elizabeth of the Trinity Parish in New Brunswick. [Citizen CBC]

Assistant Priest Fr. Joe LeClair

We had worried that Father Joe's time in the corrections system would lead to his having to find new work, but instead he will only have to find new routes to work. He will be at four different churches, not just the one next door to his dwelling.

He'll be serving: Holy Family Church in Moncton, Holy Ghost Church in Riverside-Albert, Immaculate Heart of Mary Church in Riverview, and St. Jude’s Church in Salisbury.

Father Joe, we want to support you in your new life, here is a Google map you can use to get to all the places you'll be needing to go.



Also, you might want to start talking about what a big fan you are of classic Canadian rockers like the Tragically Hip and the Stampeders, and mystical performers like Hypnotist Cyrus.

p.s. We can offer a compensation package to anyone in Moncton at Easter who gets us photos of Father Joe doing Jesus on the cross in a loincloth.

A word from our janitor...

To whom it may concern in Baghdad (Yes. That Baghdad.);

Thank you for your interest, especially in times when blogging, and blog reading figures, appear to have fallen a long way from the glory days, and look like they ain't done diving yet...

As desultory sometime custodian of this, the entropic debris of the Elgin Street Irregulars blog, I trust that you found all that you sought.

You know, after your whimsical early-morning entry of the search term "huge tits lingerie" felicitously directed you to these pages.

You follow a long line of similarly (presumably) avid researchers bent upon revealing the wonders of "Kim Basinger's ass", "sexy Thanksgiving", "sexy Christmas", "sexy Easter", "sexy Ramadan", "sexy Hanukkah", "Hooters girls", "big honkin' titties", "tight butts in short shorts", "thong T-straps", "businesswomen wearing rubber gloves", and "Rob Anders dating", as well as various medications, some possibly not counterfeit, claiming to alleviate troubling male afflictions among those not too prone to stroke, myocardial ischemia, and/or infarction.

Upon reflection, they all amount to the same thing, really. And I swear that I have no idea how Google's algorithms tagged us as good to go for any of 'em.

Ummm, okay, maybe I do. The Irregulars have on occasion delved into some fairly outré topics. Especially that Woodsy. She's a firecracker sometimes. But not the only one.

However our most popular search item of all time remains "picture of a life-size maze".

Who knew? I know I'm amazed...

Going Down is Going Up

On July 29, the Ottawa Citizen reported that a shocked couple complained about three books they discovered on the Ottawa Public Libraries "on order" list. [Citizen Article]

It's not clear who the couple are nor whether they wanted their complaint to be publicized.

This means it is an open question: Are they misguided prudes who don't realize that calls for censorship increase readership and that librarians are freedom-of-speech, anti-book-banning zealots who will hear their complaint as a reason to order even more sex manuals? Or is this couple a pair of devious sex manual publicists?

Whoever they are, I hope they complain about my book when I finally get around to writing it. Even if they don't, I'm grateful to them for making me realize I need to drop my working title: the meaningful little book of life with Jesus.

Get out your library card and click these links to get on the reservation list:

• The Going Down Guide
• The Sex Instruction Manual : Essential Information and Techniques for Optimum Performance
• The anal sex positions guide : the best positions for easy, exciting, mind-blowing pleasure
• The little book on meaning : why we crave it, how we create it
• A Meaningful Life
• A spectator's guide to Jesus : an introduction to the man from Nazareth

12 Google Resolutions for 2009

Last year I resolved to be more creative and stop relying on Google for my artistic inspiration. That didn't work out; so this year I went to Google for a dozen fresh resolutions.

In 2009:

1. I won’t be 100 percent wrong
2. I won’t be out there to lie down for him
3. I won't spend all my R&D on a meaningless pet project that fails to appeal to anybody when I could have been making videogames the whole time
   
4. I won’t create more waste
5. I won't be signing up for this challenge again
6. I won’t buy yarn except on days that begin with S
7. I won’t be as involved with Parkville WILDFIRE as I have been previously
8. I won’t have a 360-degree role anymore
9. I won’t promote my articles bar Tweeting them once
10. I won't be voting for him no matter whom he's running against
11. I won't watch GH anymore
12. I won't be surprised